I hate goodbyes

I dreaded it all week, and this morning it happened. This morning, Cat and Leanna left. They've left Ireland for good, to go back to their families and friends in America. It was one of the most difficult goodbyes I've ever had to say. Wait, no. It was the most difficult goodbye. I've been comforting myself with the fact that its not goodbye for ever, its just goodbye for now, but it's just not going to be the same without them.

Right now, I'm trying to stay in denial , but I know it won't last. It's already starting to fade. This week, I won't get to text or call Leanna. This Friday, I won't see either of them in cell group. Sunday, I won't see them in church, or get to go have lunch with them. In 2 weeks time, when An Tobar Nua is back to business, I won't get to see them when I stop by - no more smiles, no more hugs from the best hugger I know, I won't hear Leanna say "Who are you?!" or get to play with Cat's darts... There's more, but I might end up in a puddle of tears. What can I say, I'm going to miss you guys.

Apart from feeling like there are Cat and Leanna-sized holes in my heart, I have to say that I am sooo thankful for having them in my life, the friendship, the joy and the memories we shared - Our God is an awesome God, He's been blessing me again and again with amazing friends :) I'm going to look back, and think of you, and my heart will smile, and well up with love. You both have blessed my life so richly, just by being your very unique and loving selves :)

Boldbean, out!

Woah..

Half the year's done and only one post so far?

It's a new season in my life - one where I need to be serious about studying, and very separate from that learning how to be a good doctor.

One where there is a lot of uncertainty, I don't know where I will be going to work after I graduate. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Sure I'll be called a "doctor" but what am I going to do with the position that I've been placed in? Save me God, from being just another employee who works without a purpose, who works for the sake of working. There is so much more in You, Lord.

A season of transformation, there is a lot that needs working out - attitudes and behaviours that are no longer wanted or needed. A season of brokenness and humility. A season of confession, change and commitment. A season of the revival of my spirit.

The year has quickly dissipated, not without its share of ups and downs, joys and sorrows - but always with God's love and favour shining through. I will share a little more, a little later :) But for now, I'll sign off.

Walking in His favour,
Stacey

To start where I left off..

I think I use this blog as a kind of therapeutic outlet. It may seem at times like my life is full of bad things? But its really not, its usually great! Minus the times I get slightly upset, and maybe slightly dramatic :)

This is one of those times.

Not exactly feeling like a tissue box. But close enough: Who's going to be there for the person who always tries to there for everyone else?

I don't know what happens. I think what happens is that I end up feeling like my heart aches. I don't think I should have a pity party for myself, not right now anyway..

It'll be better tomorrow :)
My heart will heal, I have a Healer.
I will get comfort - I have a great Comforter.
And I have the Bestest Friend anyone could ever ask for :)